[May 8th, 2004 @ 11:55pm ] it's been a long time. shouldn't of left you. without a dope beat to step to. haha. wow. but yeah. i'm back. anyone miss me? i'm sorry but a lot's been happening in my little fucked up world. fucked up it is, indeed. i can't stop thinking about steve. i believe i am in love. <3 but i am sure it is too late. =/ p.s. - i love all of you. <3 10 rips from the bong.

[April 24th, 2004 @ 11:30pm ] THE NAME OF THE FROM AUTUMN TO ASHES (or) ATREYU SONG WHERE A GIRL SINGS. help? anybody? 7 rips from the bong.

[April 14th, 2004 @ 1:22am ] people piss me off. what the FUCK is there to do when you feel like this. uh, yeah, searching for some words to vent this out but it's only frustrating me more. and i'm left speechless. here i go, i'm about to blow. i guess the best thing to do is just breathe. think happy thoughts. old friends SUCK. friends, psh, yeah...RIGHT! it's like, here i am in this new life of mine. everything i knew and endulged in once before has all changed now. it's a whole different scene. i've adjusted. things are gettin' clearer, a lot more bearable. and i guess i'm happy, ya know? but then there's these memories that i'm left with. and these old fucked up friends that i once knew and cherished and just fuckin' lovvved to be around. i mean, i would've given it all for this crew. (would've been the biggest mistake of my life but anyway...) WHY?! why the fuck would i do that to myself? so when one wants to talk to me, i can't help but remember the way it was, forget everything i've learned, and treat them like before (even though the only time they want to chat is when they want to sell me some shrooms or weed. fuckin' fuck heads. fuck them!) thing is, it aint like it was before. even before i treated everyone better than they ever did me. hey, alls i'm sayin' is that as of now, i've decided to erase those faces from my mind, from my whole intire life, they've never existed. period. and that was all for me. consider it vented. 2 rips from the bong.

[April 12th, 2004 @ 11:47pm ] i've lost a lot of friends. ah, fuck 'em. a lot has happened. i thought i'd never be back typing on this thing again. i meant it when i said it was my low. my low isn't so terrible anymore though. i've been faced with a lot. i can take anything. i heart _holdup. she brought me back in a sense. i can't ever be addicted to this blinding screen ever again though. i can never type all of my sorrows in a scroll box again. i won't dwell like that. i talk like livejournal is some kind of portal for the insane. i really don't believe that. i seem so strange. i'm not. i don't talk like i think, thankfully. i'm so normal. maybe i'm dumb, maybe i'm dumb. maybe just happy. 9 rips from the bong.

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